Was it the son of a preacher man? A devil in a blue dress? You obviously didn’t listen—but now everyone else will.

On Tuesday, February 14th, 2012, WORN Fashion Journal will get your achey-breakey heart in front of a karaoke machine at SUPERMARKET (268 Augusta Avenue).

Don’t just feel the pain, spread it around.

We’ve got a karaoke machine, a microphone, sad, sad, sad songs, and enough bitter tears and sweet liquor to fill a swimming pool. What else could you possibly need to mourn your latest romantic folly?

All proceeds go to the production of WORN Fashion Journal. This year, Heartbreak Karaoke will fund the rent for our new office! We can’t make a magazine without a roof over our heads. Support independent publishing, and sing us a sad song!

THE RULES
$7 Admission
$5 Admission if you’re wearing red or pink
Each song is $1
Jump the line for $10
Celine Dion songs are $5

THE DETAILS
Supermarket
268 Augusta Avenue
Bring on the heartbreak: 9:00 PM
You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here: 2 AM

DRESS CODE
Red and pink preferred
Your heart on your sleeve: mandatory

Last month we had our fourth Annual Heartbreak Karaoke. You came, you wore red, and you sang your heartbreak out. This is just a sampling of our pictures — be sure to check out the rest on our flickr.

Once again Worn Fashion Journal’s Annual Valentine’s Heartbreak Karaoke night is fast approaching. You are, of course, welcome to sing any song from our catalogue, but it is Valentine’s Day, and we’re hoping you’ll wear your heart on your sleeve.

I was asked to compile a list of the Top 5 Most Heartbreaking Songs of All Time. This is what I first came up with:

5. Maggot Brain by Funkadelic

4. The Jackson Song by Patti Smith

1. Nightswimming by R.E.M.

Serah-Marie asked me to elaborate, so I explained: Nightswimming seems to be about how the passage of time, even to the living, is analogous to death. Halloween Parade is about the early days of AIDS in Greenwich Village. My Mummy’s Dead is pretty self-explanatory (and the nursery-rhyme melody only underscores the misery). The Jackson Song is Patti Smith’s ode to her son & deceased husband. Maggot Brain is an instrumental meditation on George Clinton’s reaction to finding his dead brother’s remains weeks after he’d been shot through the head.

Serah-Marie pointed out that, although very sad, these weren’t really songs about heartbreak, they were heartbreaking songs about death. So here’s a list that Serah-Marie and I came up with together:

5. Eleanor Rigby by The Beatles
It doesn’t take a PhD in communications to recognize that this is a song about loneliness.

4. Heroes by David Bowie
Two lovers from opposite sides of the Berlin wall take their chances with the armed guards.

3. Don’cha Go Away Mad by Frank Sinatra
Guy gets caught cheating, and tries to placate his girl by half-heartedly acknowledging “you got a reason to be mad I suppose.” But she shouldn’t be mad because how was he to know that her cousin would be at the same restaurant? Entire self-help books would be written about this guy. And the girl doesn’t have a clue.

2. Everything by Connie Francis
Ms. Francis crossed over to country music in the mid-70s and given her thematic track-record, the move made complete sense: “Who’s Sorry Now?” “Breaking in a Brand-New Broken Heart” “Don’t Break the Heart that Loves You” “I Cried for You”

1. Everything by The Smiths/Morrissey
Like Connie Francis, Morrissey’s got the titles: “Why Can’t I Get What I Want” “Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now” “Girlfriend in a Coma” and so on. But his lyrics push him into the number one spot: “There’s a club… but you leave on your own and you go home and you cry and you want to die.” “I will undoubtedly die alone,” etc.

This list is better, but I’m still not completely satisfied. What do you think are the most heartbreaking songs ever?

Your Host, Karaoke Ted.

HEARTBREAK KARAOKE
MONDAY, FEBRUARY 14, 9pm
THE SUPERMARKET, 268 Augusta Ave, Toronto
$7 at the door, $5 if you’re wearing RED

Was it the son of a preacher man? A devil in a blue dress?

Or just that guitar picker your daddy told you not to marry

(You know they ain’t no good and your babies will probably grow up to be cowboys, too.)

You obviously don’t listen – but now everyone else will, dammit.

WORN FASHION JOURNAL proudly presents

the 4th Annual VALENTINE’S DAY HEARTBREAK KARAOKE

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 14, 2011

don’t just feel the pain, spread it around.

We’ve got a microphone, sad, sad songs,

and enough bitter tears and sweet liquor to fill a swimming pool.

What else could you possibly need to mourn your latest romantic folly?

The hurtin’ happens at THE SUPERMARKET, 268 Augusta Ave

Doors open at 9 PM

Heartbreak at 9:01

Total emotional catharsis and hail a cab at 2 AM

$7 at the door, $5 if you’re wearing RED

Consider this your chance to dish it out instead of take it. You can thank us later.