If the Shoe Fits, or How My Folly is Your Freebie

Please note: T-Rex is not to scale.

A couple of days ago I had an early dentist appointment. Afterwards I had some time to kill before work, so I thought I’d do a little window shopping. I wasn’t planning on buying anything – until I saw those shoes. They didn’t look like much on the shelf, but there was something that made me want to try them. A combination of pearly patent and black suede, their Deco lines and towering, knife-thin wedges made me think of the Empire State Building. What choice did I have? (One should never pass up the chance to try on footwear that looks like of architecture.)

I put them on and fell in love. Now, I’m usually at least an 8.5, but to my surprise, they felt quite roomy. I slipped into the 8s. They were a little snug, but not bad. That heel was going to force my foot forward, I thought, and the shoe would be sure to stretch. I didn’t want to get stuck with a shoe I kept slipping out of so, after walking around a bit just to be sure, I went with the smaller pair.

They don’t fit.

I wore them to work the next day. Inside of two hours they were cutting into the sides of my foot; my toes were sardines in a very pretty can. Yet every time I looked down I couldn’t bear the idea of giving them up. I wanted to cry, but I didn’t. Instead, I went back to the store and bought the exact same shoe in a half-size up.

Now I have these 8s – these barely worn, beautiful 8s that I can’t return and can’t wear – just sitting on my bedroom floor. The good news? They could be yours.

Tell me why you need to have these shoes. The most compelling response (according to my very subjective judgment) wins and that very lucky person gets them. Yes, for free. This is open to anyone, WORN staff included. They wear shoes too, after all.

You can email me or make your case in the comments. You’ve got until Wednesday, June 3 to make your case. There are really only three conditions: First, I’ll pay for postage inside Canada, but outside of that you’re on your own. Second, we at WORN reserve the right to post responses on the site if we choose. Third, if you’re going to the SOL[e]D party, you have to promise not to wear them. Since I bought them twice, I think I should get first dibs on that.

So let’s hear it, Cinderella. Move me.

Dinosaur not included.
Shoes are a US size 8, or Euro 38.
Heel measures just shy of 4 inches.

19 thoughts on “If the Shoe Fits, or How My Folly is Your Freebie

  1. dear CB,

    i have a lady that works & lives side by side with me. she is extremely talented, superb taste and can smell good style many many miles away. she’s working hard at making a name for herself and we have both contributed to this month’s worn issue. i think this would make a swell present since her birthday is coming up this august. i do not know what else would make this request better than other requests, however i’ll say that maybe FIRST comment wins?


    *safe solvent™

  2. OH MY GOD, I need these because not only am I obsessed with Chanel pearl vs. black but also art deco and elegant wedges (okay, I lie, I am obsessed with anything wedges because wedges are awesome). I mostly need these in my life though because these really are very reminiscent of art deco and since I melt for pretty much anything art-related and fashion-related (seriously , check my blogs) this combo is perfect for me. They might definitely melt my knees but hey anything for art vs. fashion. Also these are my size… and I love you?

  3. Those are extremely sexy shoes and…. wait for it… in my size! These shoes will look great with my pencil skirts and 40′s style fitted polka-dot dress.

    Not only will these add to my meager collection of shoes (I only have 3 wearable pairs – and one includes flip-flops and the other, running shoes), but they will ensure that I am not featured in “What not to wear” since I will be *that* much closer to being a fashionista!

    If this doesn’t convince you, I can pay for shipping! And will take photos :P

  4. I’m going to be honest here: until the age of 20, I didn’t get shoes. As in, didn’t understand them. Throughout high school and half my university career it was all doc martens and keds to bars and parties. My mother was horrified.

    “How are you going to be a lady if you can’t walk in heels?” she says.

    I love my mother, but that’s not what convinced me to spike up the heels. I’ve got fallen arches, and heels are one thing my doctor says can help with flat feet, so long as I don’t wear them too much. But here’s the problem: I do. And unapologetically.

  5. I need these shoes. I don’t own a pair of heels but I LOVE heels of all kinds. I just can’t afford them–tuition why?–so instead I borrow my friends. Unfortunatly I feel bad because I wear them more then they do :P. That’s why I need these shoes. I need them so I can start my collection of pretty heels, and hopefully after one pair I will cave and by more of my own.

  6. I have this summer job. I love it, really, except for this one thing.

    I am a tour guide and interpreter at a museum that will remain nameless. It’s quite great, generally. We have a lot of houses and historic buildings, and every day at work is like getting all dressed up and playing pretend.I meet a lot of nice visitors every day, the people I work with are lovely, I get to look after a garden, and I am full of extremely specific and wonderfully random trivia that I cannot wait to put to use in my daily life. Overall, I’m pretty thrilled.



    I have to do all of it in shoes that look like this:


    (Note their exasperating sensibility and tragic lack of heel.)

    Also, because I am a tour guide, I spend 50% of my time walking backwards.


    I would like to know how you would feel about having to wear those thing for four months straight. They are not the kind of footwear in which one dances for joy. The weeks that stretch ahead make my shoe-loving heart all weepy and distressed.

    These magnificent heels of yours would fit me perfectly and bring beauty and glamour and pearly, suede-y joy to my otherwise dreadful repertoire of summer footwear.

    Frankly, without these, my future is bleak.

    Also, I promise that I will learn to walk backwards in them.

  7. If someone asked me where I came upon such amazing shoes, I would have to say, “They were a gift from Coco Buck of Worn Journal.” At which point they would pretend they know who you are, resume their shoe swooning, whilst I raved about the deliciousness that is WJ. Then they would go home, Google you and feel absolutely compelled to subscribe.


  8. I deserve them – I am a perfect Euro 38 with thin feet, perfect for those shoes.

    And this is why. Please be assured this is a sob story.

    I want to have hot, adorable shoes like that as my ‘I’ve won’ shoes. I had a spinal cord injury in December, and I’m working on walking again. Every single one of my shoes for summer I can’t wear, so I’ve loaned them out to my sister (with a few exceptions – a girl can’t give it all up, incl my boots from Italy, and my f***-me pumps I wore to my wedding party). I’ve loaned out everything, and am in a old grandma scooter, or using forearm crutches everywhere. I gained a buttload (literally) of weight that I have my perfect outfit waiting for me in the closet, for me to work on. I’m going to PT almost every day, working my way back.

    I want a pair of heels like those adorable ones to be my win. They may not be worn immediately, but they will be my attainable goal.

    Am usually on your Xanga side – xoxo, Sara

  9. Wow, those shoes really are beautiful! Not my size though unfortunately. Where did you get them/what brand are they? I might wanna look them up for myself!

  10. Dear Human Groveling Experiment Director, aka ‘C.B.’

    Firstly, BRAVO for concocting such an entertaining human discovery contest. In my opinion there are not enough competitions anymore, and I do love a good challenge by prose.
    But, to A) give away the shoes versus sell them on Kajiji like every other nitwit out there deserves props and to B) Fill the void in your wallet with approval and envy by exploit women’s weakness for fashion and designer labels….. well, that’s just brilliance.
    In any event, I can tell, by the innovative contest parameters, and shoes themselves, I like your style. So here’s my deal:

    Let’s be clear, I don’t want the shoes for anyone but me……not for a friend who actually deserves them……. not an offering of charity, to give to someone who doesn’t have shoes, unlike myself…..who is pushing 20 + pairs, summer collection alone. Let’s face it…. there’s no ‘team’ in ‘footwear’, there is however the word ‘foot’, and these feet promise to love them forever.

    I am an independent urban woman, who’s devotion to fashion has been greatly compromised by starting my own interior design company. My shopping addiction and predilection for hot designer items has plummeted and pretty much been put on hold until my business gets it’s footings. Now, wipe you tears, I’m not playing the pity card here…. I plan on doing very well, however, until then, the schmoozing, company party gallivanting and client ‘charm and disarm’ tactics will continue. How much better would I do rocking those amazing Art Deco-esque heels, giving them the exposure and notoriety they deserve in all the artsy and design circles?

    And the added bonus…….I won’t be attending your party in fact, as a thank you for your charity I would be happy to write to you and just let you know which large gatherings and inner city happenings I plan on attending, sporting those gems.

    In any event, great taste and great contest,

  11. I was a stylish girl before my job took me to middle of nowhere North Dakota. Over the last 7 years, my fashion sense has eroded. I no longer have any sexy shoes because I wear boots to work everyday. It is not uncommon to see hunting camo around town. Next week I am once again moving for my job, this time to Las Vegas. I need to come out of my fashion coma and these shoes could help me in my recovery to the land of the living.

  12. I hesitated at first. Toyed with the idea of making a submission. Thought that I wasn’t deserving of a free anything, let alone a free pair of impeccably selected shoes. Felt guilty that I might capitalize on someone else’s misfortune.

    After much thought I re-considered. Pourquoi pas? For the sake of your shoes! Aren’t they deserving of a loving home? I will certainly love and care for them. I will take them on a fantastic voyage – strutting around town, accessorizing many of my favorite fashion-forward outfits. And really, what I wear is inspired by things I see other people wearing: on the street, in magazines, in runway shows. A good example has twice the value of good advice. Forget feeding my imagination! I’m faced with the possibility of actually wearing the object of desire.

    So why gift your beautiful shoes to me? Because I understand that shoes give meaning to the entirety. Because I am a style setter. Because I will wear your shoes with gusto and truly inspire. Because if someone asks me where I got said shoes, I will be honest and tell them about your generosity.

    For the love of shoes! Pick me!

  13. They will motivate me out of my mom clothes.
    They will make my legs look long and elegant and for that I may treat them better than my own children.
    I won’t wear my Birkenstock clogs to a business meeting again.

  14. P.S. My girlfriend just pointed out to me that many people mentioned their hardships in a ploy to convince you. Fearful my failure to do so may very well be my downfall, I decided it was prudent to urge upon you that that my decision not to complain about my “June gloom”, my rough and tumble life, being overworked and well underpaid, should not detract from your decision to inject my closet with a dose of your cool.

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